A FAIL so large...it may lead me to drinking

I woke up this morning to some great news from my local footy club, the Portland Timbers.  News so wonderful, it was going to be a complete game-changer for my summer plans.  The Timbers announced that they will be hosting Manchester City - of the ENGLISH PREMIER LEAGUE - this summer on July 17.  My baby brother is getting married on July 18, and my gears got to turning as to how I'd go see this game and make the wedding the next day.  Seriously, I was thinking like that.

But then something caught my eye.  Look at the lower corner below Senor Horse Face Carlos Tevez

What?  Why....?  I don't get it.  It's the EPL.......in Portland.  Why the hell? 

I actually had to sound it out as I read along.  EXCLUSIVELY......FULL-SEASON.....What?

Why?  Why would the Timbers bring in the Man City crew and not let me buy tickets?  Last year, the Timbers brought in Burnley - a newcomer to the EPL this year.  But this is no Burnley.  This is Man City.  This is Tevez and Adebayor.  This is the club of Given, who couldn't stop a goal for Newcastle.  And this is the same Man City of Joleon Lescott.  Lescott, for an Everton man like myself is the worst.  The potential to see Lescott, and to JEER his name for Evertonians everywhere was the only thing on my mind.

For those of you who don't remember, Lescott started the year with Everton, wanted out of Everton and played awful for the club to start the year.  At the height of his pouting, he left Tim Howard (the great American keeper) to fend for himself against Arsenal in a game that had the squad give up six goals. 

I want the chance to scream, for ninety minutes, at Lescott.  He will know me by the time that game is through.

But again, I'm not a full-season ticket holder....yet.  That is in the works.  But that's a year away at most.

So I go to stubhub.  And what do I find?

$300 clams for a ticket.  I suspected as much.  But here is where I see the reason.  Not only are the Timbers bringing in the EPL squad, they're also bringing in Boca Juniors from Argentina (also a big deal - one of the best known clubs from South America).  And in the Boca field, you can buy tickets from a much lower price range.  And the reason?  It's at the club's home field of PGE Park.

And yet Man City is playing in Portland...against the Timbers....in Merlo Field?  What the hell?

What could possibly be more important than the EPL coming to Portland?

This.....

The Portland Beavers, the AAA baseball team, have a game in the stadium the same day.  I'm sure that Man City had a strict schedule and they couldn't go to another date. 

But hey, it's Art in the Park.  Paint your own F'ing baseball.  While one of the most recognizable clubs in the soccer world is playing at Merlo Field.  How big is Merlo Field?  Here's what Wikipedia said...

Not even 5,000 seats. Awesome.  So for a little bonus to season-ticket holders, we're going to show Man City in a venue that couldn't hold a decent 4th of July Fireworks viewing party.

I'm so sickened right now that it hurts my head.  And it's things like this that have got me in the camp that says get AAA baseball into a new stadium already - or get it out.  A legitimate sporting venue is coming to town, and it's being blocked by Art in the Park and a crowd of 2000-3000 people.  Great.

It's small town shit like this that makes it impossible for Major League Baseball to look at us seriously.  It small-timing logic like this that doesn't let us get more done to bring more sports to the forefront.  Are you telling me that the game between a couple of AAA squads couldn't be canceled and moved to a double-header the day before?  Really? 

And what gets me is that the owner (Merrit Paulson) of the AAA Beavers is the same owner of the future MLS Timbers.  I feel for him though.  This city has given him nothing but grief since he started to try to grow this thing.  At least he's here.  But this is just a fail in the land of fandom.  No other way of looking at it.